Look Ma, No Home!

Testing the limits of "make yourself at home"

One of the hallmark travel habits of 20-somethings is the ever popular couch crash. While relatively green to the concept of having money, post-college journeymen and women reluct at parting with their hard earned dollars for anything that isn't bacon-wrapped or cargo-pocketed. Granted, as we get older and our bank accounts get a little more cushy, the itch to act like a growed up and get a hotel room when we visit our out of town friends starts scratching its way into our psyches, but we continue to fight for our right to couch surf. I'm proud to report that even at the ripe old age of 30 I've been able to tamp down the ominous threat of "maturity" and continue to sleep on the sofa whenever I head out of town. In fact, I'm even taking it to the next level now that I've landed back in the states without a home or a job - I'm a career couch crasher.

Yessir, my transformation from responsible adult to useless layabout is nearly complete. In my furthering efforts to continue the good fight and find a human rightsy job back here on the homefront, I've become that dude for whom you make excuses for when you bring home a late night booty call. I'm the permanent fixture in your living room that continually takes your snack food when you're not at home. The six-packs I provide as in-kind payment keep me on your sunny side, but I'm always one coffee spill away from ruining our friendship. And guess what - I'm not going anywhere.

Well, that's not entirely accurate. I actually am in the process of re-integrating into the normal routine of NYC living, it's just that the process is slow-moving. To help me out along the way, all of my friends have been super supportive and amazingly willing to let me use up their vital resources while figuring out what  my next steps will be.So believe you me, I want to get off of your couch as much as you want me off of it, it's just that the glacial pace of the job market right now is keeping me firmly planted in the middle cushion with me feet splayed lazily across your snack table. I suggest we just treat this like I'm a friend visiting you from out of town...indefinitely.